Prayer is one of our greatest weapons in the spiritual battle for our marriage. There is an overwhelming number of cases when the Lord listens to the prayers of His people and it changes the course of history. We need to take our prayers seriously. We need to consider how we can strengthen our marriages and support our husbands in prayer.

Your prayers, they aren’t just a moment at the end of the day where you lay our a Santa Claus wish list before God. Prayer is a weapon. It is a craft that you must learn and wield.

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. – Ephesians 6:12, ESV

Prayer is not an afterthought. It is not the least you can do, it is one of the most effective, meaningful things you can do for your marriage.

1. Pray for his heart to be captivated by God

King David was a man of many shortcomings. But his legacy wasn’t his shortcomings or his sinful nature but the way that his heart was devoted wholly to God. If we care about our husband’s lives and legacies, we need to be on our knees praying that their hearts will be more captivated by God than they are by us.

We need to surrender the number one spot for the One who should be preeminent in both of our lives. Our individual lives and marriages must take place in a larger Gospel-narrative where we realize that Christ will reign over Heaven and Earth fully one day and must reign in our heart now.

His heart must belong to God. We need to pray that God will capture the affections and devotion of our husbands and we need to turn and point out the goodness of God regularly to our families.

2. Pray for his wisdom to increase

Proverbs is full of promises that, when we ask for wisdom, God will answer us. In a world that is constantly bombarding our husbands with enticements to lure them from the things of God, we need to pray that they will be given wisdom.

Wisdom floods into every area of our life. From our spiritual life to our work to our relationships, there is no place where wisdom does not aid us. True wisdom, wisdom from God, is something we all must be pursuing. One of the primary ways we can practically love our husbands is by praying for God to increase their wisdom.

3. Pray for his willingness to exercise his spiritual gifts

It can be so hard to step out in faith and embrace what God is calling us to. Stepping out into the unknown is intimidating. Women as a whole tend to be better about grouping with one another and acknowledging our shortcomings. Men tend to be expected to hide their vulnerabilities.

Stepping into what God is calling us to do is often unsettling. In our culture, it can be especially hard for men to step into a position where they have to depend on something other than themselves to come through.

4. Pray for his ability to encourage you spiritually

This is one of the hardest things I can pray for my husband. Because often, spiritual growth does not come from gentle encouragement to read my Bible but from someone who intimately knows me looking at my life and showing me where my actions aren’t lining up with my words and beliefs.

On the new season of the Netflix series The Crown, there is an insightful moment when Prince Phillip says that he knows his wife better than she knows herself because he can see her fully with all of her strengths and weaknesses. We need to ask God to give our husbands insights int our lives.

Pray that your husband will be able to encourage you in your own walk with the Lord. Ask God to give him wisdom as he looks at your life to encourage and grow you as you’re being conformed into the image of Christ.

5. Pray for his understanding of Christ to deepen through your marriage

Our marriages are not lived out in a vacuum. Love cannot sustain itself because it is not an end, but a beautiful beginning that points us to Christ. We should be praying that our marriages show our husbands the bigger picture. The love the Christ has for His Church, His persistence in pursuing us despite our endless list of failures, is shown in our marriages.

Pray that God will use your marriage to impress in His heart a deeper understanding of the sacrifice that Christ made for His bride, the Church. Ask God to show them just how wide and deep and faithful His love is for your husband. May the beautiful image of Christ’s love for the Church inspire and encourage your husband in his pursuit of holiness.