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The Thin Place

Blessed Be the God Who Is Holding My Babies: Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss

This article originally appeared on She the Fierce.

Isn’t it funny how one little call can change so much?

A few weeks ago, I got a call I didn’t anticipate, letting me know that two little embryos, two little lives my husband and I had created, had been stripped of their life.

The babies we wanted to love and cherish every moment of their lives were no longer alive. They were gone before we even had a chance to name them. The heart that had swelled with more love than I ever imagined possible for little cells multiplying in my womb sunk deep within me.

I had been praying. I trusted in God to bring the babies safely into my arms. But in His wisdom, He called them to Himself instead. When I had calmed myself, I texted a dear friend and told her that my little ones were no longer on this earth. Her response stopped me in my tracks.

“Oh no,” she wrote, “Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

I expected sympathy. I expected her to decry the injustice of my babies being taken from me.

I never expected her to offer praise to their maker. She echoed words of Job: “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” – Job 1:21, ESVIn my moment of despair, I was angry at God. Why had He given me the joy of their little lives only to rip them from my womb? I was doubting the goodness and wisdom of the One I claimed to trust. My heart wasn’t in it, but I needed to praise.

Because without that God, my hope would shatter into despair.

My heart wasn’t in it, but I needed to praise. Because without that God, my hope would shatter into despair. Click To Tweet

If I didn’t know that my God was watching my despair, bottling my tears, and weaving together a beautiful, perfect plan, I don’t think I could have gone on. But I can move on because the Lord, He is a good God. Jesus may have called my little ones home, but I know He is holding them in perfect love. They will never know the sting of the scratched knee or hurtful words, they will only know His goodness.

Because of His goodness, I will bless His name.

My friend was right to draw my mind to God’s goodness. She comforted me without allowing me to fall into despair. When life is hard, when plans go array, I need to remember where my hope is found. It is not in the future I have planned for myself nor in the children I desired, it is grounded solely and firmly in the Lord. Praising Him in the midst of hardship puts this into perspective. It reminds me of His sovereignty and comforts my aching heart.

Job knew my grief even more poignantly. He had just lost his 10 children all at once. But he praised the name of the Lord nonetheless. Because even in our darkest moment, God still is good and still deserves our praise.

The pain of pregnancy loss is not lost on God. He knows what it is to lose a child. 

My pain is not lost on God. He knows what it is to lose a child. Click To Tweet

He willingly sent His son to be mocked, scorned, tortured, and executed upon a cross for me and for you. How dare I doubt the goodness of one who would go to such an extreme to demonstrate His love for me? But yet, I do doubt and must force myself to call to mind His goodness and faithfulness to me. So I praise. I remember what God has done for me. I preach the truth of His gospel to myself when I doubt what is real and find myself chasing the promises of this world.

Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #christian #infertility #fertility #faith

Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #christian #infertility #fertility #faith Blessed Be the Name of the Lord: Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #grief #christian #devotional #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #infertility Blessed Be the Name of the Lord: Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #grief #christian #devotional #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #infertility Blessed Be the Name of the Lord: Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #grief #christian #devotional #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #infertility Blessed Be the Name of the Lord: Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #grief #christian #devotional #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #infertility Blessed Be the Name of the Lord: Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #grief #christian #devotional #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #infertility Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #christian #infertility #fertility #faith Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #christian #infertility #fertility #faith Finding Comfort After Pregnancy Loss #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #christian #infertility #fertility #faith

God has promised to redeem every moment of my life.

Nothing that has happened, nothing that will happen, will be untouched by His grace. While everything Job has was returned to him doubled, he only had 10 more children. Because the lost children, they were never really lost. They were being held and loved by their Maker. They were cradled closely to His bosom just as my little ones are. My hope is found in the goodness of my God. He loved my little ones more than I did. He acted wisely. I don’t know why and I probably never will this side of heaven. But I do know that if it is what God has ordained, if I knew what He knew, I wouldn’t choose it another way.

So I can say boldly, “Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

You might also like: 

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Pray Like Hannah and Give It to God

10 Triggers To Remind You To Pray Without Ceasing

Wrestling With God

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The Comments

  • Diane Ferreira
    October 25, 2018

    Thank you for sharing this. I have gone through pregnancy loss and it so painful but it is comforting to know God holds these babies when we cannot!!

    Reply
    • Bailey
      Diane Ferreira
      October 29, 2018

      It is very comforting.

      Reply
  • ememist
    October 25, 2018

    Sorry for your loss. I felt that way too when one of my twins died. But eventually, I learned that it is God’s plan not mine. Btw, you are blessed to have a wonderful and Christian friend <3

    Reply
    • Bailey
      ememist
      October 29, 2018

      I am so blessed by my friends. God is good, even when it’s hard to see.

      Reply
  • adaughtersgiftoflove
    October 29, 2018

    I pray for a lot of babies and pregnant women, I found myself reluctant to share a true miracle with women who had had a loss, but I had to because it gives them hope,and He gets the glory. You can have peace knowing He has the answers, and I would give them names. Sharing to Pinterest.

    Reply
    • Bailey
      adaughtersgiftoflove
      November 1, 2018

      It is always good to hear miracles of what God has done. God is good, even when life is hard.

      Reply
  • Kimberly A Wyse
    October 29, 2018

    Absolutely heart breaking and challenging words. Thank you for sharing. And as you mourn, I pray that God will comfort you.

    Reply
    • Bailey
      Kimberly A Wyse
      November 1, 2018

      Thank you, Kimberly.

      Reply
  • Jennifer
    November 13, 2018

    Hello, 6 months ago my beautiful baby Olivia was stillborn. That is a pain like no other. I spent 12 years praying for a baby… now I have 3; and all of them are in heaven. I was sooooo angry at God for taking her when I had spent so much time praying and I was so close to having my prayer answered; and then to have it all slip away in an instant. The pain was intensified as I watched 6 friends, 2 cousins, my neighbor and both of my sister in laws have babies all in 1-3 months of my loss. I just held a baby for the first time yesterday. I remind myself that God is good; sometimes if I’m being honest though, I feel like He doesn’t love me. I know that isn’t true, but there will always be moments when I’m in pain from losing my baby that I feel He doesn’t love me. I just remind myself that He is good and that He knows exactly how I feel. I pray for any mom who has lost a child.

    Reply
    • Bailey
      Jennifer
      November 13, 2018

      I’m so sorry for your loss, Jennifer. You are in my prayers. <3 God is good, even when life is hard.

      Reply
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Hello, I’m Bailey
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Hello, I’m Bailey

The Thin Place was born out of a season of struggle. A season where I felt stretched thin and desperately longed to see the goodness of God in the land of the living. The goodness of God showed up in unexpected ways. During that season, the spiritual disciplines laid out in Scripture, the traditions of the Church, and the reminders of His faithfulness seen in liturgial living and the feasts and seasons of the Church calendar all opened my eyes to the hope we have in Christ.

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Baruch, as you may recall from the book of Jeremiah, was the scribe of Jeremiah. This is a prophetic book written by Baruch calling the people of Jerusalem to repent of their idol worship and return to the Lord. 
Baruch is a great reminder of the importance of confession. The book opens with a call to make respond.
Then they wept, and fasted, and prayed before the Lord; and they collected money, each giving what he could – Baruch 1:5-6 RSVCE 
Baruch is a collection of the response to sin – both the acknowledgment of sin and the call to God’s mercy. 
#christianwoman #graceupongrace #jesusgirl #inspiredfaith #womenlivingwell #jesuscalling #faithfilledcaptions #catholicblogger #Catholicconvert #CatholicWoman #chasingsacred #christianwomenleaders #bibleverse #biblestudy  #christianblogger #faithinhim #proverbs31woman #faithful #Godisgood #encouragementgallery #godslove #christianposts #christianquote #prayer #prayertime 
#biblequotes #bibleinspiration
thethinplace
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Baruch, as you may recall from the book of Jeremiah, was the scribe of Jeremiah. This is a prophetic book written by Baruch calling the people of Jerusalem to repent of their idol worship and return to the Lord. Baruch is a great reminder of the importance of confession. The book opens with a call to make respond. Then they wept, and fasted, and prayed before the Lord; and they collected money, each giving what he could – Baruch 1:5-6 RSVCE Baruch is a collection of the response to sin – both the acknowledgment of sin and the call to God’s mercy. #christianwoman #graceupongrace #jesusgirl #inspiredfaith #womenlivingwell #jesuscalling #faithfilledcaptions #catholicblogger #Catholicconvert #CatholicWoman #chasingsacred #christianwomenleaders #bibleverse #biblestudy #christianblogger #faithinhim #proverbs31woman #faithful #Godisgood #encouragementgallery #godslove #christianposts #christianquote #prayer #prayertime #biblequotes #bibleinspiration
4 weeks ago
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1/5
The Book of Sirach is part of the Wisdom literature of the Bible. It was also written during the Maccabean revolt to encourage the people to hold fast to their Jewish faith and not to neglect the traditions and commandments handed down to them. 
Sirach is one of the books of the Bible found among the Dead Sea Scrolls in the late 1940s. It is also found in every copy of the Septuagint suggesting that is was considered to be Scripture by the Greek speaking Jews of that period.
It is full of practical, clear wisdom that is incredibly applicable to our lives today such as: 
The greater you are, the more you must humble yourself; so you will find favor in the sight of the Lord. - Sirach 3:18
The higher your position, the more you have to actively seek humility. When you are in a low position, when you rely on others, humility is a more natural disposition and you recognize your dependence on God. When you are great, you need to actively seek humility. 
Do not say, “Because of the Lord I left the right way”; for he will not do what he hates. - Sirach 15:11
This is pretty straightforward. We cannot blame the Lord when we choose sin. The Lord does not do what He hates. He will always provide a way for us to choose good and it adds to our shame when we choose sin and blame God for it. 
A slip on the pavement is better than a slip of the tongue; so the downfall of the wicked will occur speedily. - Sirach 20:18
As the Book of James expands upon the importance of bridling your tongue but more abut consistently in the Book of Sirach we are exhorted to keep charge over our tongues. Ironically, this is much easier said than done. 
Whether you’re new to the wisdom literature or have spent years pouring over proverbs, Sirach is a great place to begin in living a wiser, more biblical life. 
#bibletime #biblereading #readyourbible #proverbs31woman #proverbs31 #womenintheword #savedbygrace #virtuouswoman #godlywoman #godsgirl #christianliving #butgod #givemejesus #trustgod #daughteroftheking #walkbyfaith #beautyfromashes #graceupongrace #dailydevotional #faithjourney #jesuslover #faithblogger #godisgood #graceoverperfection #michiganblogger #biblescripture
thethinplace
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The Book of Sirach is part of the Wisdom literature of the Bible. It was also written during the Maccabean revolt to encourage the people to hold fast to their Jewish faith and not to neglect the traditions and commandments handed down to them. Sirach is one of the books of the Bible found among the Dead Sea Scrolls in the late 1940s. It is also found in every copy of the Septuagint suggesting that is was considered to be Scripture by the Greek speaking Jews of that period. It is full of practical, clear wisdom that is incredibly applicable to our lives today such as: The greater you are, the more you must humble yourself; so you will find favor in the sight of the Lord. - Sirach 3:18 The higher your position, the more you have to actively seek humility. When you are in a low position, when you rely on others, humility is a more natural disposition and you recognize your dependence on God. When you are great, you need to actively seek humility. Do not say, “Because of the Lord I left the right way”; for he will not do what he hates. - Sirach 15:11 This is pretty straightforward. We cannot blame the Lord when we choose sin. The Lord does not do what He hates. He will always provide a way for us to choose good and it adds to our shame when we choose sin and blame God for it. A slip on the pavement is better than a slip of the tongue; so the downfall of the wicked will occur speedily. - Sirach 20:18 As the Book of James expands upon the importance of bridling your tongue but more abut consistently in the Book of Sirach we are exhorted to keep charge over our tongues. Ironically, this is much easier said than done. Whether you’re new to the wisdom literature or have spent years pouring over proverbs, Sirach is a great place to begin in living a wiser, more biblical life. #bibletime #biblereading #readyourbible #proverbs31woman #proverbs31 #womenintheword #savedbygrace #virtuouswoman #godlywoman #godsgirl #christianliving #butgod #givemejesus #trustgod #daughteroftheking #walkbyfaith #beautyfromashes #graceupongrace #dailydevotional #faithjourney #jesuslover #faithblogger #godisgood #graceoverperfection #michiganblogger #biblescripture
1 month ago
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The Book of Wisdom full of poetic principles and outlines how to live life well. Written around the time of the Maccabean revolt, it is written in the style of Solomon (and is sometimes referred to as “The Wisdom of Solomon”) but was written by later authors.
While this book was not accepted in the Jewish cannon, it is in every copy of the Greek Septuagint but it was quote by St Augustine over 800 times and, most importantly, was declared Scripture at the Councils of Hippo and Carthage. 
It focuses on Wisdom guiding the lives of the faithful, the follies of the wicked, and focuses heavily on our future home with God and the life to come. 
For those of you familiar with the Nicene Creed, the Book of Wisdom is one of the sources of inspiration of our description of Jesus Christ. The reference to Christ being “Light from Light” is taken from Wisdom 7:26 which refers to Wisdom as being a “reflection of eternal light.” 
There are also several passages in Wisdom which foretell the death of Christ. One of my favorite passages is Wisdom 14:7, “Blessed is the wood by which righteousness comes,” which reminds me how truly blessed is the cross which held the Savior of the world, our perfect Sacrifice. 
Wisdom is very similar to the book of Proverbs in length and style. It points constantly to the Lord who, as James tells us, is ready to give wisdom to those who ask.
#proverbs31woman #proverbs31 #womenintheword  #virtuouswoman #godlywoman #godsgirl #christianliving #butgod #blessedandhighlyfavored #trustgod #daughteroftheking #walkbyfaith #daughterofaking #beautyfromashes #graceupongrace #dailydevotional #faithjourney #jesuslover #faithblogger #godisgood #graceoverperfection #michiganblogger #wordbeforworld
#thinplaces #encouragingquotes #christianlife #christianencouragement
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The Book of Wisdom full of poetic principles and outlines how to live life well. Written around the time of the Maccabean revolt, it is written in the style of Solomon (and is sometimes referred to as “The Wisdom of Solomon”) but was written by later authors. While this book was not accepted in the Jewish cannon, it is in every copy of the Greek Septuagint but it was quote by St Augustine over 800 times and, most importantly, was declared Scripture at the Councils of Hippo and Carthage. It focuses on Wisdom guiding the lives of the faithful, the follies of the wicked, and focuses heavily on our future home with God and the life to come. For those of you familiar with the Nicene Creed, the Book of Wisdom is one of the sources of inspiration of our description of Jesus Christ. The reference to Christ being “Light from Light” is taken from Wisdom 7:26 which refers to Wisdom as being a “reflection of eternal light.” There are also several passages in Wisdom which foretell the death of Christ. One of my favorite passages is Wisdom 14:7, “Blessed is the wood by which righteousness comes,” which reminds me how truly blessed is the cross which held the Savior of the world, our perfect Sacrifice. Wisdom is very similar to the book of Proverbs in length and style. It points constantly to the Lord who, as James tells us, is ready to give wisdom to those who ask. #proverbs31woman #proverbs31 #womenintheword #virtuouswoman #godlywoman #godsgirl #christianliving #butgod #blessedandhighlyfavored #trustgod #daughteroftheking #walkbyfaith #daughterofaking #beautyfromashes #graceupongrace #dailydevotional #faithjourney #jesuslover #faithblogger #godisgood #graceoverperfection #michiganblogger #wordbeforworld #thinplaces #encouragingquotes #christianlife #christianencouragement
1 month ago
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3/5
Chances are, the Books of Maccabees are probably the deuterocanonical books you are most familiar with!  It is in these books that we find the origins of Hanukkah.
To be honest, they are a rough read. A really rough read. They detail the suffering the people of God endured while their enemies attempted to control their land and wipe out their religion. 
It is a set of books filled with great suffering as many of the faithful are killed but it is also a book of great bravery and trust in the Lord in the midst of trials.
In Maccabees, two of the theological principles used today are clearly seen. The first, that God created the world out of nothing. 2 Maccabees 7:28 details how God did not make the world out of things already created, but out of nothing. 
The second principle is that of praying for the dead. While there are references throughout Scripture and it is a clear practice of the Early Church, it is most clearly referenced in 2 Maccabees 12. 
#christianwoman #graceupongrace #jesusgirl #inspiredfaith #womenlivingwell #jesuscalling #faithfilledcaptions #catholicblogger #Catholicconvert #CatholicWoman #chasingsacred #christianwomenleaders #bibleverse #biblestudy  #christianblogger #faithinhim #proverbs31woman #faithful #Godisgood #encouragementgallery #godslove #christianposts #christianquote #prayer #prayertime
thethinplace
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Chances are, the Books of Maccabees are probably the deuterocanonical books you are most familiar with! It is in these books that we find the origins of Hanukkah. To be honest, they are a rough read. A really rough read. They detail the suffering the people of God endured while their enemies attempted to control their land and wipe out their religion. It is a set of books filled with great suffering as many of the faithful are killed but it is also a book of great bravery and trust in the Lord in the midst of trials. In Maccabees, two of the theological principles used today are clearly seen. The first, that God created the world out of nothing. 2 Maccabees 7:28 details how God did not make the world out of things already created, but out of nothing. The second principle is that of praying for the dead. While there are references throughout Scripture and it is a clear practice of the Early Church, it is most clearly referenced in 2 Maccabees 12. #christianwoman #graceupongrace #jesusgirl #inspiredfaith #womenlivingwell #jesuscalling #faithfilledcaptions #catholicblogger #Catholicconvert #CatholicWoman #chasingsacred #christianwomenleaders #bibleverse #biblestudy #christianblogger #faithinhim #proverbs31woman #faithful #Godisgood #encouragementgallery #godslove #christianposts #christianquote #prayer #prayertime
1 month ago
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4/5
Judith is another archetypal story of the battle being won at the hand of a woman, seen also in Judges and Esther. 
During the reign of Nebuchadnezzar, an army is sent to destroy the mountain town that Judith lives in. The people are greatly distressed and death seems to be the only option. Judith, a wealthy widow, trusts in the Lord and ultimately, kills the opposing military leader and brings peace to the people.
It is a story of God’s provision for His people in their exile through an unlikely source, a widow. In Judith, we see an archetype pointing to Mary and to the Church, waiting for her true Bridegroom. 
But it is also a story that points to the Lord’s desire to draw all nations to Himself! One of my favorite parts of the book of Judith is that it tells us of the conversion of a man who initially sets out to fight the Jewish people coming to believe in the God of Abraham, Issac, and Jacob. 
“And when Achior saw all that the God of Israel had done, he believed firmly in God, and was circumcised, and joined the house of Israel.” - Judith 14:10
It beautiful reminder that God’s deliverance is for all mankind. 
#proverbs31woman #proverbs31 #womenintheword  #virtuouswoman #godlywoman #godsgirl #christianliving #butgod #blessedandhighlyfavored #trustgod #daughteroftheking #walkbyfaith #daughterofaking #beautyfromashes #graceupongrace #dailydevotional #faithjourney #jesuslover #faithblogger #godisgood #graceoverperfection #michiganblogger #wordbeforworld #encouragingquotes #christianlife #christianencouragement
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Judith is another archetypal story of the battle being won at the hand of a woman, seen also in Judges and Esther. During the reign of Nebuchadnezzar, an army is sent to destroy the mountain town that Judith lives in. The people are greatly distressed and death seems to be the only option. Judith, a wealthy widow, trusts in the Lord and ultimately, kills the opposing military leader and brings peace to the people. It is a story of God’s provision for His people in their exile through an unlikely source, a widow. In Judith, we see an archetype pointing to Mary and to the Church, waiting for her true Bridegroom. But it is also a story that points to the Lord’s desire to draw all nations to Himself! One of my favorite parts of the book of Judith is that it tells us of the conversion of a man who initially sets out to fight the Jewish people coming to believe in the God of Abraham, Issac, and Jacob. “And when Achior saw all that the God of Israel had done, he believed firmly in God, and was circumcised, and joined the house of Israel.” - Judith 14:10 It beautiful reminder that God’s deliverance is for all mankind. #proverbs31woman #proverbs31 #womenintheword #virtuouswoman #godlywoman #godsgirl #christianliving #butgod #blessedandhighlyfavored #trustgod #daughteroftheking #walkbyfaith #daughterofaking #beautyfromashes #graceupongrace #dailydevotional #faithjourney #jesuslover #faithblogger #godisgood #graceoverperfection #michiganblogger #wordbeforworld #encouragingquotes #christianlife #christianencouragement
1 month ago
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